[from BEAN] The Greatest Invention Ever Created
TV

I can't believe what science today is capable of. I saw this cryptic advertisement for a new invention during the superbowl, with scientists and clipboards and beakers and all of this mind-blowing fantastical technological crap. Apparently after years of blood and sweat and tears and millions of dollars of R&D, our greatest corporate scientest have come up with this: a razor with FIVE BLADES! The Gillette Fusion.

I know what you're thinking..."Five f&*%king blades? Too much battlestar galactica sci fi for you. We are least 20 years away from that. Well strap in little girls. Were not in Kansas anymore, trying to stab the hairs off with old rusty pitchforks. They put ANOTHER blade on the back! See, the five blades will shave off the hair, the little baby hair follicles, and 3 layers of zit. But what's that blade on the back for? Its evil genius baby. Its to lull your naive, happy go lucky face cells into that false sense of security, to let thier guard down before POW facial five blade Armageddon.

I have never been prouder to be an engineer.

And The Onion can predict the future. From Feb 2004. www.theonion.com/content/node/33930